Posted by Bright Girl (My sincerest apologies to Christopher Marlowe and Sir Walter Raleigh, great poets indeed) on Saturday, 27 June 1998, at 10:23 p.m.
Parody of the poems, "The Passionate Shepherd to his love," is from Christopher Marlowe and "The Nymphs Reply," is from Sir Walter Raleigh. The first verse belongs to the first poem, then the response from Methos is from the second poem.
Kronos to Methos:Come ride with me and be my friend
And all mortals alike, to hell we'll send
From villages, cities, towns and malls
To be a Horseman, that is your call
Methos Responds:
If all the world and beer were gone
And even the rock where you crawled from
Those mortals I might have to defend
I have changed, I am not your friend
Kronos to Methos:
But we will sit up on our throne
Seeing mayhem and destruction rome
By this furry creature, a monkey it's name
The Ebola will surely grant us fame
Methos Responds:
Time will come, the throne will rust
Avoiding death, to me is a must
And a monkey has lice, ALAS!
But I won't say that in front of Silas
Kronos to Methos:
Then I will make thee beds of sweaters
And a thousand blue boxers
A fridge full of cheap, dark beer
Come on now Brother, what dost thou fear?
Methos Responds:
The sweaters do fade in time, trust me
And boxers I have lots, just ask BG
Joe's Bar, Mac's fridge, I am welcomed at both
So leave my Brother and don't forget yer coat
Kronos to Methos:
My Leather is made from finest hides
Yer coat is black and so unrefined
Me boots are spit shined and licked well
Twinkle Toes? That's you, I can tell
Methos Responds:
Thy Leather, thy boots
I care thee not for them
My toes are treasured
Just ask my harem
Kronos to Methos:
A caged witch to thee I entrust
Her eyes enraged but not of lust
And if her pleasures make thee drool
Come ride with me and the world let's rule
Methos Responds:
Thy crazed witch with press on nails
I'd rather see her cuffed and jailed
Her pleasures I doth hack spit at
I'd rather join Caspian and eat a rat
Kronos to Methos:
The Horsemen soon will ride and our voices will ring
For we delight in each day of killing
If Freedom delights thy mind
Then ride with me, I am the End of Time!
Methos Responds:
But could killing last with the Highlander around?
Beer, nuts, a couch, more beer
These are those that delights my mind, you hear?
Kronos, I'm a loyal drunk now, I fear!