If you will consult your tour guide map you will see the following areas are open to visitors. You are cautioned to avoid restricted areas. G & K Enterprises will not be held liable for nosy tourists who can't follow directions.
(You'll find the Parodies here)
(Recipes. What did you think?)
(You'll find the photoalbums and scrapbook [con reports] here)
I regret (well, not really. I'm rather enjoying it.) to announce that due to the sensitive nature of its contents, the Library is now closed to all personnel except Official Bootlickers.
(A list of our Bootlicker job descriptions and duty roster)
(Where Leather Lad's favorite long, sharp, pointy things are kept. NO TOUCHING!)
(In the Guest Suites, Valentine Pelka and Galatea and Melvin,
In the Master Suite, Godiva and Leather Lad.)
Looking for a guest book? Well, we don't keep one anymore. Tourists were drawing graphic anatomically correct pictures with diagrams and step-by-step instructions. Caspian took it with him when he went to live with Raeven and we haven't bothered replacing it. And we probably won't. You're not supposed to be looking in any guest book anyway. What did you come here for?
We also no longer care how many people have visited here. We used to keep a counter to check to see if our accountant was skimming the take. It disappeared when he did a little creative programing. He has since been terminally reprimanded. What do you care? You've got your receipt.
You may contact the Kompound Kommandant, Godiva at "Godiva at hotmail dot com" to convey your grateful appreciation for her efforts in conveying to you the feeling of brotherhood we at the Kompound embrace, through providing this simple and unassuming website. It is highly encouraged that you be generous and exuberant in your praise. Offerings of chocolate would not be amiss.
Vita Brevis, Ars Longa